Talked late into the night, or rather I talked, freed up, opened up to all possibilities via Mary’s love and acceptance. Trying out different scenarios for the future, imagining what it’ll be like, talking about current changes and how interesting they are once you get past the shock and monstrosity of it all. These discussions are utterly amazing and plumb the depths of our relationship.

Talked about going fast or slow, of telling people, FFS, getting the boys in the loop the almost-inevitable end of it all. I continue to be wonderfully shocked at the honesty of the connection. And I’m wondering how Mary can possibly grapple with this. How do you sit down with your husband and talk plainly about plans for a sex change? She seems so solid, so supportive, and I believe that she actually is all of that, but it’s always jolting to me to hear her say something matter-of-fact about changing. Yesterday, for example, looking for bathrooms in the museum, she pointed to the men’s room and said, “Here’s yours,” and then a pause and a wry look over her shoulder as she entered the women’s room, “at least for now.”